


Ginger Biscuit Child

by AWRA



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Growing Up, Light Angst, Magnus is sentimental, Slice of Life, he's also kind of clary's fairy godmother, or warlocky godfather or whatever, you know he acts like he isn't but he would get emotionally attached to plants if they could talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-05
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-07-12 10:55:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7099984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AWRA/pseuds/AWRA
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Magnus has put spells on Clary since she was little. He has literally seen her grow up. And he's grown quite fond of her during the years.</p>
<p>(Or, all the times Magnus had to renew the spells on Clary's mind as she grew up and lowcore hated himself for it)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ginger Biscuit Child

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! So I find the thing about Magnus having seen Clary grow up really interesting and I'd love to see them interact more, because you know Magnus is lowcore protective of Clary. I mean, he's protective of basically everyone, and Clary is the first child he ever saw grow up and all that stuff.   
> This is a mix between book and TV show canon, but I don't think you need to have read the books to understand it. Please tell me what you think

"Good evening" Magnus said.

"Magnus" Jocelyn seemed tired. There were dark circles under her eyes, her clothes were worn and she looked thinner than the last time Magnus had seen her. Between adapting to the mundane lifestyle, working and raising a small child, Magnus supposed she didn't have much time to relax.

"Hi" Magnus looked down, and found himself looking at a little four-years-old with wide green eyes. Clary was holding on tightly on her mother's hand, half-hiding behind her legs. Magnus smiled down at her.

"Hello, little one" he said. He stepped back to let the two come in.

"The spell is wearing off already. A few days ago she asked me why there was a man with purple skin" Jocelyn said. Magnus rolled his eyes. Typical Shadowhunter behavior, complaining about a warlock's work the moment they saw him.

"Well, forgive me but you know, it's not like parents line up at my doorstep asking me to take away their children's Sight. I think I'm allowed a slight imprecision on the tempistic" Magnus said.

"We'll be more precise next time then" Jocelyn sighed deeply "Will it take long?" she asked, running a hand on her face.

"It's a delicate process, Jocelyn. It'll take the time it'll take."

She sighed again. Then she crouched down in front of her daughter and smiled. "Hey, Clary, this is a... friend" she said "He needs to do a thing for you. I need you to listen to what he says, ok?"

"Ok" Clary nodded, with all the seriousness a toddler is capable of. She had a small stuffed animal with her, a little dog she was hugging to her chest. She looked up at Magnus then. She eyed him with suspicion, and Magnus smiled at her again. She hid her face against her dog.

"Your name is Clary, right?" Magnus said. Clary nodded. "I'm Magnus. It's very nice to meet you."

Clary looked at him for a second, and then said, "Your hair is pink" Then she tilted her head for a second and continued, very serious, "I like it."

"Oh, I'm glad" Magnus said. How does deal with small children? He wasn't an expert on this. He wished Tessa was there.

"Kitty!" Clary squealed, and Magnus turned around to see the Great Catsby slowly making his way from the bedroom. Immediately Clary ran past him and towards the old cat.

"Nope" Magnus said, remembering how her last meeting with his cat had went. Jocelyn made to stop her daughter, but Magnus was closer and faster in reaching her. "Sorry, sweetie, but he doesn't like little girls too much."

Clary giggled and squealed in delight as Magnus picked her up. She was heavy, for being so tiny. He put her down on the couch, almost getting kicked in the ribs as she squirmed. She held up her tiny arms with a huge smile, asking to be picked up again. She was quite an adorable little thing.

Jocelyn had stopped when the warlock had grabbed Clary, and Magnus half-expected her to be angry for having lifted her up. Instead, she smiled. "I think she likes you. Generally she gets pretty angry when strangers pick her up." she said.

"She's a smart little kid, then" he said "Can I offer you something while you wait?"

"If you had a coffee, that'd be nice."

"Here you go" he said, snapping his fingers and conjuring a coffee from a nearby place "No offense, but you look like you need it."

Jocelyn took the cup and hesitated for a second, before taking a sip. "The mundane world is... complicated" she said.

"Yes, I agree."

"I don't risk dying every other day, which is a nice thing, but paying rent is almost as terrifying" It was strange, to hear a former Shadowhunter complaining about rent.

Magnus wondered idly what kind of job Jocelyn had. He knew she was an artist, but he had no idea how much money she would get from that alone.

Deciding that small talk time was over, Magnus crouched down in front of Clary, who was now very concentrated on making her stuffed dog race over the pillows on the couch. "Are you sure you want me to do this, Jocelyn?" he asked.

"I told you. I don't want her to know about all of this" Jocelyn said.

Magnus pursed his lips. Hiding the Shadow World from Clary was a mistake, he knew it. But Jocelyn was unmovable on that point. "Do you think you can do a little thing for me, Clary?" he asked the child.

"What?" she asked, turning towards him.

Jocelyn went to sit on an armchair close by, and Magnus could feel her eyes on his back. Someone about to do magic on your daughter makes everyone a little nervous, he supposed.

"I want you to stay still for a while, alright? Stay really, really still" he said, hoping Clary wasn't one of those hyperactive children who had to move at every two seconds. The little girl looked at her mother for reassurance, and Jocelyn nodded.

"Fine" she said.

Magnus began to work on her mind, and halfway through the spell she went slack, the magic working as a sort of sedative. It took Magnus a good twenty minutes to carefully cast the spell while avoiding any damage to Clary's mind, and when he was done Clary seemed hypnotized.

"She's a bit out of it because of the magic. Give her a few minutes and she'll be fine. You can stay until she wakes" he said to Jocelyn, standing up. His legs protested for having been in that position for so long, and he went to pour himself a drink. Being in the mind of a toddler sure was an interesting experience.

"Thank you" Jocelyn said, caressing her daughter's hair.

Magnus threw a glance over at Clary, and had to look away. It was so wrong to have that outgoing child staring at the empty space in front of her. It was just disturbing.

He swallowed his drink and poured another. Not to mention that he had just used his magic to steal memories from a four-years-old child who had no idea what was going on around her. Parental consent or not, he just felt bad about having done it.

Ten awkwardly silent minutes later, Clary had shaken off most of her confusion. "Mommy, where are we?" she asked, frowning.

"Nowhere special, sweetie. Come on, we're going" Jocelyn said, standing. Clary jumped off the couch, and then her eyes found Magnus.

"Hey" he said over his drink, smiling.

"Hi" She had already forgotten about him, and while it meant that Magnus had done a good work it also put him off a bit.

"I'll call you in a while" Jocelyn said.

"Have a good night" Magnus said. He closed the door behind them. Clary kept looking at his hair the whole time.

 

***

 

Jocelyn looked far better and more relaxed when she came to Magnus's place for him to wipe six years old Clary's memory. Clary was still holding onto her mother's hand, but she didn't hide behind Jocelyn when he opened the door.

"Hello" she says, looking at him with obvious curiosity.

"Hi" Magnus smiled at her, and Clary shyly smiled back. Her red hair was tied into two braids that kind of stick out on the sides of her head, and Magnus saw the space left from a fallen tooth. Oh, they grew up so fast.

"Mom, what's going on?" she asked Jocelyn as she led her to an armchair and made her sit down.

"Magnus here will do a little thing" she answered. The most unhelpful answer of the century, in Magnus opinion.

"What thing?" Clary asked.

"It's nothing, sweetie" she said, clearly unsure of how to tell her daughter a warlock was about to put a spell on her without mentioning magic.

"Mom" Clary was clearly unsatisfied with the answer. "Moooom, why are we here?" It seemed her mother's lack of proper explanation was unnerving her. Now, a nervous child wasn't something Magnus wanted. How does one make a six-years-old calm down, he wondered.

Magnus snapped his fingers. Of course. "Are you hungry?" he asked. He conjured a pack of biscuits from the kitchen, offering.

Jocelyn declined, but Clary was quick to grab one and bit it. "Clary" Jocelyn sighed "What do we say when someone gives us something?"

"Thank you" Clary said around a mouthful. She swallowed, and then beamed at Magnus. "Can I have another? Please" she added.

"If your mother says it's ok" Magnus said.

"You can" Jocelyn said, and Clary's hand shot to grab another biscuit.

"Thank you" she said, before wolfing it down.

Magnus couldn't help but smile. "I'll give you the whole pack, if you stay very still for me for a second" he said.

Clary beamed at him, far too cute than any child with their mouth full had any right to be. Ok, maybe Magnus was starting to get a bit of a soft spot for her. "Alright" she said. Jocelyn then shook her head.

"Should I pay you for the biscuits, then?" she asked.

"No, see it as a gift. I take her Sight, she takes my biscuits" he said.

He kept his promise and gave Clary the biscuits when she and her mother left, although the kid couldn't remember what they were for. She was looking at Magnus with a confused expression, and he felt oddly relieved when the door closed behind her and her mother.

He rubbed his temples to rid himself of the clinging impressions of Clary's memories. He sat still on his armchair for a second, and then he huffed out a laugh. Without thinking about it, he had given Clary ginger biscuits. _Ginger_ biscuits. To a girl with red hair. Ginger to a ginger.

It wasn't funny. Not really. And technically speaking that color wasn't even ginger. But spending long amounts of time in a child's mind probably had some weird side effects.

_Biscuit_ he thought. Yes, it fit little Clary.

 

***

 

With Clary growing up, they had decided it was best to stop going to Magnus's loft for the memory spell. The kid would start asking questions sooner or later, and it would be hard to find an excuse to justify why she was in a place she had no memories of getting at with a man she had never seen before.

The apartment where Jocelyn and Clary was nice, and Magnus could feel the presence of wards around the building. Runes, and Dorothea's spells.

"How are you?" Jocelyn asked after letting Magnus in. She went to kitchen to prepare a coffee, one Magnus thought he could use at this ungodly hour. It was barely 9.30 in the morning. Damn Nephilims and their habit of getting up early in the morning.

"Beautiful and amazing, as always" Magnus answered. He heard Jocelyn snort.

"Why did I even ask" she commented, as he let himself plop down on the couch.

Clary ran into the room, holding a stick covered in glitter that Magnus assumed was supposed to be a magic wand. He wondered how did this kid have so much energy this early in the morning. "Who are you" she asked, pointing the stick at Magnus "that dares come into the princess's realm?"

"Clary!" Jocelyn sounded positively shocked "Don't say those things to people! I'm sorry Magnus, she's in a Disney phase and likes to pretend she's some sort of. Magic princess, or something. She's much more well-behaved, usually."

"It's alright" Magnus said "I am... I am a good wizard here to help the princess" he said solemnly, deciding to play Clary's game.

"How?" Clary asked, lowering the glitter-stick and walking towards him.

"There is a curse on the princess, and I am here to break it" he said.

Clary's eyes widened. "There's a curse on me?" she asked.

"I'm afraid so. But worry not, I am here to save you from it" Magnus said.

Jocelyn came in carrying a trail. "Clary, put that away" she said, nodding towards Clary's magic wand.

"Mom! He's a good wizard, he says there's a curse on me and he's gonna break it!" she said excitedly, completely ignoring her mother's order.

"That's nice of him" Jocelyn said, giving Magnus a look that clearly said she wasn't impressed. Magnus shrugged. He didn't see the harm in letting Clary have some fun.

"Can you do a lot of magics?" Clary asked "Other than breaking curses?"

"Oh, yes."

"Like what?"

Magnus thought about it for a second. Summoning demons, nah, stealing food from fancy restaurants, not very educative, what could a little girl with a love for Disney princesses like... "I go to people with ugly clothes and turn them in much better and more fashionable items" he said. Raphael still hadn't forgiven him after the last time Magnus had decided to change the content of his closet. Ungrateful vampire, Magnus was just trying to do him a favor and rid him of all those funeral clothes.

"Like Cinderella's fairy godmother!" Clary exclaimed "Are you like a fairy godmother?"

Jocelyn snorted into her coffee. Magnus hesitated for a second. He had been called many things in his long life, but he had to admit 'fairy godmother' wasn't one of them. " _Sure_ " he said eventually.

"Are you _my_ fairy godmother?" Clary asked with wide, marveled eyes.

Magnus didn't think he could stay serious much longer. "Of course, biscuit" he said, using all of his self control. It was kind of embarrassing, and he was pretty sure Jocelyn wasn't breathing.

"That's so cool!" Clary said "Can you show me some magic, fairy godmother?"

"Of course I can. But first, we need to break that curse there is on you" he said, ignoring Jocelyn trying not to fall over in a fit of vaguely hysterical laughter.

"Right, the curse!"

"The curse. Now, come sit next to me and look at me straight in the eyes. And don't squirm."

Clary did as she was told, and Magnus felt a pang of guilt. He was blatantly lying to this little girl, using the trust she had for some reason automatically decided to put into him to take away a part of her mind. He chastised himself. He was the High Warlock of Brooklyn, he was here to do a job, not to get emotionally attached to a child with angel blood he had seen five times in six years. He dived into her mind, ignoring his irrational sense of guilt.

It didn't really help to see the bright, energetic child sitting in her post-spell catatonic state. Magnus stood up, aware that he should leave before she woke up and also pretty eager to do so.

"You're good with children" was Jocelyn's comment as she led him to the door.

"It's one of my many talents" Magnus said, shrugging.

"Until next time, fairy godmother."

" _This_ " Magnus said, glaring at Jocelyn as she grinned at him "Is not something we will ever talk about again. Clear?"

Jocelyn nodded. Magnus didn't trust that smile in the slightest, and hoped that if she did decide to tell someone about this it would be someone with no contacts with any of his friends. The simple idea of Raphael or Catarina, or worse yet, _Ragnor_ knowing he had just told an eight-years-old he was her fairy godmother made him shudder.

 

***

 

Clary was clinging to her mother, tears running down her face and a terrified expression as Jocelyn rushed in Magnus's loft.

"What's going on?" she sobbed as Jocelyn made her sit down on a chair. She was terrified, and Magnus could understand it. She had just been attacked by a demon, saw her mother kill it with a sword and now she was in the house of a strange man with cat's eyes.

"Clary, it's important that you let us do this" Jocelyn said.

"I wanna know!" Clary said, jumping out out of the chair. Jocelyn pushed her back where she was. Jocelyn looked at Magnus, pleading, and after a moment of hesitation he conjured a rope. Jocelyn tied her daughter to the chair, as Clary looked disbelieved from her mother, to Magnus. He looked away, uncomfortable by the child's expression.

"It's ok honey, it's for the best" Jocelyn said.

"You're not protecting her, you're deceiving her" Magnus said. He had never fully approved of Jocelyn's plan of hiding the Shadow World from Clary, and he had told her on more than one occasion, but he had gone along with it. But now that it had been proved that hiding her Sight would not protect her, he didn't see how continuing this would be beneficial.

"For as long as possible" Jocelyn retorted.

"She won't be a child forever, Jocelyn" he said. Another demon was bound to find her someday, and Jocelyn wouldn't be there to save her daughter forever. It was better if Clary knew about what would happen.

"For now, I don't want her part of our world."

"Mom, please, I don't want to do this" Clary said. It was obvious she had no idea what was going on, and she was scared. Magnus felt the impulse to untie the ropes and tell her that it was alright, that he wasn't going to hurt her.

"Please, take her memories" Jocelyn said again. There was a desperation in her voice, and Magnus knew she wouldn't be dissuaded.

He called out his magic, and saw Clary's mouth open at the sight of it. Then he began to work. First to go was the memory of the demon. Then he started to dig deeper into her mind, joggling through images of Jocelyn and Luke and a normal mundane neighborhood and flashes of a little boy with glasses.

"You know it's getting harder and harder to suppress her Sight" Magnus said when he was done. He could feel the beginning of a headache. It had taken him more than half an hour to be sure the spell was in place.

"It's still too early to tell her this" Jocelyn said.

Magnus felt angry. To tell her what? That she wasn't completely human? That there were things out there that wanted to kill her? This was ridiculous. It wasn't fair for her. She was old enough to know who she was. Magnus was getting tired of robbing her of a part of her identity.

But Jocelyn was Clary's mother, and he was just the warlock who buried her memories once every two years. "Just know that she won't be happy when she'll find out. And you'll have to tell her eventually" he said, opening a portal to their home.

"I'll deal with that when the moment will come" Jocelyn said, untying her daughter and taking her through the portal.

 

***

 

Magnus came to the appointment a couple days late. There had been a problem with a demon and a couple spells going the wrong way, and he had been too drained to be able to work on Clary's mind safely. Jocelyn had told him it was ok since they still had some time before the spell wore off, and told him to come whenever he had time.

Dorothea told him Jocelyn was out and Clary hadn't come home from school yet, and he lounged in the shop, absently looking at the antiques. Maybe he should have warned before coming over, but he was there now.

The little bell over the door ringed, and Magnus turned around to see Clary coming in. She was much taller than the last time he had seen her. It had been two years and she had probably started to hit puberty by now, yes, but it still put him off. She also looked positively miserable.

"Clary? Are you alright?" Dorothea asked.

"'M fine" she said. She obviously wasn't. She was staring down at her feet, and hadn't noticed Magnus looking at her in a corner of the room.

"Did something happen to you? Did you get a bad grade? Did you have a fight with Simon?" Dorothea asked, sounding a little like a concerned parent.

"No, no" Clary made her way to the stairs, before stopping and turning to Dorothea "Dot, do you think I'm good at drawing?" she asked.

Dorothea blinked. "Of course you are. Why?"

Clary bit her lip. "Because today Sarah and Liz kept telling me my drawing sucked, and Simon told them it wasn't true but Simon is my friend so he has to say that? And my drawings aren't good like Mom's."

No little girl should look like that, Magnus decided. "You shouldn't listen to what some girls say, biscuit. I'm sure your drawings are amazing."

Clary turned to him, startled. "You don't even know how I draw" she said. She didn't ask him who he was or what he was doing there. Magnus suspected her subconscious told her she knew who he was, even though she couldn't remember him. He was surprised she didn't show hostility towards him, considering how their last encounter had gone.

"Would you like to show me?" Magnus asked. He saw Dorothea looking at him, and he winked at her.

Clary hesitated, before huffing and opening her bag. She took out a small notebook and handed it to him.

Magnus looked at the drawings there. Sure, they weren't masterpieces, but this girl had talent. He hadn't even known how to old a pencil when he was her age. Well, pencils didn't even exist when he was her age, but that wasn't the point. "I think they are very pretty" he said.

"No, they aren't" Clary was frowning and looking up at him, as if trying to remember who he was. It wouldn't work, the spell was still too strong.

"And why would I lie to you?" Magnus asked. Clary huffed.

"My mom draws better" Clary said, crossing her arms.

"You just need to practice" Magnus replied. He handed her her notebook. "I really like your portraits. You should make more."

Clary shrugged. "The only one that poses for me is my friend Simon, and he's not good at it. He keeps moving" she said.

"Magnus is very good at posing for portraits" Dorothea said. Magnus whipped his head to look at her. She smiled.

"You would... pose for me?" Clary said, looking up at Magnus.

Magnus wasn't a monster. He wasn't gonna make this little girl sad again, and it's not like he had anything to do until Jocelyn came by. And a part of him wanted to make it up to Clary for terrifying her so much when he had taken her memories. And so he found himself sitting on a step as Clary drew his face on her notebook.

"Are you Dot's friend?" she asked.

"Yes."

"Do you come by often? I don't think I've seen you before" she said with a frown. "Or maybe I just don't remember."

"I'm the kind of person one usually remembers" Magnus said. Clary smiled. Sitting this close, Magnus could see she had started to experiment with make-up. Nothing big, just some lipstick and a hint of eyeshadow. He made a mental note to send her a different kind of lipstick later. This color really didn't suit her.

"So... I didn't get your name" Clary said.

"Magnus" It was strange, to hear someone you have kind of watched grow up ask you for your name "And you are Clary, right?"

"Yes" She looked at her notebook, then at him, then back at her notebook, then back at him, and frowned.

"Is there a problem?"

"I'm not getting your eyes right" she said "There's something strange about them."

Magnus's glamor was still in place. Maybe Clary subconscious was telling her that wasn't how Magnus's eyes were supposed to be, memory spell or not.

Clary finished her masterpiece right as Jocelyn came home.

"Clary" she said, looking at the scene before her.

"Hi Mom" Clary said, standing up.

"Hello, Jocelyn" Magnus said, with a certain severity to his tone. Clary looked at him.

"You know my mom?" she asked.

"Me and Magnus haven't seen each other in a long time" Jocelyn said "How about you come up for a coffee?"

"That would be wonderful" Magnus answered. He made for following Jocelyn up, and felt a hand tugging at his sleeve.

"You didn't see your portrait" Clary said.

"Of course, how silly of me. Would you show it to me?"

It wasn't exactly a masterpiece. The main indicators that the face was his were the eyeliner and the hair that kind of resembled his current hairstyle.

"Do you like it?" Clary asked.

"It's wonderful" Magnus smiled at her.

Clary's eyes light up. "You can have it if you want" she said.

Magnus blinked. "If you want to give it to me, biscuit, I won't say no" he said.

Clary grabbed her pencil and wrote something on the edge of the paper. "Mom says you always have to sign the things you do" She tore the page from the notebook, and offered it to Magnus. He took it, a little dumbfounded, and carefully folded it to put it in his pocket.

"Thank you" he said.

"You're welcome" Clary smiled "You're nice" she said, climbing up the stairs.

When Magnus went home that evening, a dull pressure behind his temples from having spent so long in Clary's mind, he sat down on his armchair and looked at the childish portrait she had drew him.

She was so trusting of him. He had literally been taking pieces of her mind away for her entire life, and yet Clary's mind told her he was a friend. No matter that he had watched her grow up, or that he had seen her mind on so many occasions that it was as if he knew her far more than he actually did, he shouldn't be getting emotional over this, he really shouldn't. He had done far worse things in life than taking away someone's memory.

Still he carefully put the drawing on the table and opened himself a bottle of whiskey, deciding it was the only way to burn out all the self-loathing he was currently experiencing. Fuck emotions.

 

***

 

Magnus looked at Clary up and down. There was something well, not disturbing, but definitely strange about this.

"Who's this?" Clary asked, and Magnus hadn't ever been greeted by her like that, and for some reason it kind of hurt a little. But, alas, she was fourteen now, and he was an adult, and therefore he was The Enemy.

And what's more, she was a teenager in the middle of her emo phase. She had straightened her hair, had a lot of eyeliner on and wore a striped shirt with black pants that, in Magnus's opinion, really didn't go well together. And Magnus's opinion when it came to clothes was simply the best.

"Magnus Bane" he introduced himself to her. Again.

"Clary Fray" she said, shaking his hand. She looked at the rings he was wearing with a certain appreciation.

"Clary, could you go in the living room with Magnus?" Jocelyn asked "I have to speak with Dot a second."

They sat next to each other on the couch, and Clary said, "Have we met already?"

"Biscuit, if we had already met, you'd remember me" _unless I took your memories._

"You just don't really... seem like a friend of Mom's" she said.

"Is it the eyeliner?"

"I love your make-up" she said.

"A girl with good tastes, I see" At least when it comes to make-up. Those clothes are simply terrible, though. But he wasn't going to argue with a fourteen-years-old when it came to clothing. He had the feeling it would be like repeatedly hitting his head against a brick wall.

They spend a few minutes trading make-up tips – or rather, Magnus shared his wisdom with her. But then Jocelyn came up, and Magnus wasn't there to spend a pleasant afternoon discussing make-up.

By the end of it, Magnus _did_ feel as if he had banged his head against a brick wall. He stood up, and had to steady himself as his vision started to swim.

"Is everything alright?" Jocelyn asked.

"I believe her mind is developing some sort of defense mechanisms against my magic. I'm not sure how much more I'll be able to repress her Sight" he said.

"I didn't think it could happen" Jocelyn said, frowning.

"It's quite rare, actually, but it's not unheard of. People who's minds have been touched by magic many times start to become resistant to it. Her mind as been subject to magic for all her life; my magic in particular. And now it's starting to reject it" Magnus said.

Although the level of the defenses Clary was developing was confusing even to him. He had never heard of someone without magic whose mind so strongly reacted to it. Maybe it was because of Clary's angel blood, or maybe it was simply the fact that he had started erased her memories for so long, or a mixture of both.

"Can you do it for a little bit longer?"

Magnus glared at Jocelyn. "I can, yes. But I'm not sure how many more times I will be _willing_ to do it."

"She's only fourteen" Jocelyn said.

"How many weapons had you mastered when you when fourteen, Jocelyn? How many runes did you have?" he growled.

"She's not ready yet."

Magnus scoffed. "Good evening, Jocelyn" he said, leaving the apartment. He didn't think he could stand Clary's empty gaze much longer.

Once he got back home, he let himself fall face first on his bed. He closed his eyes and willed what remained of Clary's memories to leave his mind. It was so not right, that Clary knew nothing of him and he knew all of her life. Literally. He never purposely watched Clary's memories, he would never invade her privacy like that, but that didn't mean he didn't catch glimpses.

The next time Clary saw him, she wouldn't know him again. And he would still have bits and pieces of her life floating in his mind. He would have to get rid of them somehow. It just wasn't fair on Clary.

 

***

 

The worst time was when Clary was sixteen. When Magnus came to the appointment, it was Luke Garroway who opened the door. He could hear voices coming from the house, fighting.

"Is it a bad moment?" Magnus asked.

Luke sighed deeply. "The spell started wearing off early. Clary... she heard me and Jocelyn talking about the Shadow World, and she's... upset."

Magnus inhaled deeply. "I guess my presence isn't required then."

Luke looked at him with an apologetic expression. "Joss wants you to do it anyway."

"She's sixteen! She's not a small child that has to protected by everything!"

"I know" Luke shook his head, and Magnus knew the werewolf had the same opinion as he did on erasing Clary's memories. "But Jocelyn won't let up. Come in. Just know that Clary is... she's _very_ upset."

Upset was an understatement. Clary was red in her face, and she took a step back when she saw Magnus.

"Who is he?" she asked. Hearing the scared undertone in her voice sent a pang of hurt is Magnus's chest. He had seen Clary afraid before, but his fear had been directed at the situation she was in, not at him in particular.

"I'm a friend" he said "I'm here to help you."

Clary didn't believe it, apparently. She was sixteen, scared, hurt, and sitting calmly as a stranger did something to her wasn't something she was going to let happen without a fight. Tying her wasn't an option, and in the end Magnus had to use a spell to hold her down.

"I'm sorry, biscuit" he told her.

"What's going on?" Clary tried to fight against the invisible constrains, staring at Magnus with wide, terrified green eyes.

"It's gonna be alright" It wasn't an answer, and Clary didn't calm down.

"Please let me go" Magnus just sat down and go to work.

"We can't hide it from her forever, Joss" Luke said, looking sadly at Clary sitting on the couch with a blank expression.

"I must agree" Magnus said. He was sitting on an armchair, resting. The spell had never taken him so long before, and coupled with holding Clary still he was feeling a bit drained. His head pounded.

"Just a little longer" Jocelyn said, almost pleading.

"She's not a child anymore. She'll be eighteen when the spell will wear off. She'll be an adult" Luke said.

"Even if I thought this was a good idea, I wouldn't be able to do the spell much longer" Magnus said "The mind of an adult is harder to manipulate than that of a child, and her mind in particular is getting stronger and stronger each time. You have no idea how hard it was to make the spell work. I could do this for another couple times, maybe, but even I have limits."

Jocelyn took a deep breath. "I'll tell her. When she's eighteen. The spell will wear off, and I will tell her, and I won't have you erase her memories again."

"Good."

Clary's breathing started to change, a sign that the magic was going to wear off soon. It was Magnus's cue to go. "If you'll excuse me" he said.

He portaled home and immediately took two aspirins to calm his headache. Magic or not, mundane remedies sometimes worked wonders.

He should call Catarina next morning, have her take away the glimpses of Clary's life that he didn't have any business knowing and yet he still remembered.

 

***

 

"Magnus?"

He was about to get out of the Institute, but her turned around when he heard his name being called. He found Clary in front of him. "Yes?"

"Thank you" she said "For all that you did to help me. For waking my mom up."

Magnus smiled. "It was nothing, biscuit" he said.

After all the years he had spent suppressing parts of Clary's mind, it was simply fair for him to help her. And debts of conscience aside, he cared about Clary. He wanted her to be happy. And even if he would never admit it, he was the tiniest bit proud of her. Which was absurd, because it wasn't as if he had actively been part of her life until a few weeks before, but he _had_ seen her grow up into the fierce girl she was today.

Catarina was right, old age _was_ making him a sentimentalist.

"You always call me that" she said "Biscuit. I've never really thought about it, but I don't think I've ever heard you calling someone else that way. I don't really like pet names, but it just... feels normal for you to call me that, if it makes sense."

Magnus had a flashback of a little ginger child smiling at him with crumbs over her face. "I guess it just fits you better than any other pet name does" he said.

Clary smiled, and opened her mouth as if to speak. She closed it, and looked at Magnus for a second. And then she took a step forward and pulled Magnus into a hug.

"I know you like to act like you don't care about anyone but yourself, but I think deep down you're actually a good person" she said.

"I have no idea what might have given you this impression and I am quite offended by it" he said, but hugged her back.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

**Author's Note:**

> [](http://www.a-weird-rusted-android.tumblr.com/>My%20Tumblr</a>)


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